Ah, love. Isn’t it swell? It can be so swell, in fact, that some people who are in love decide to cement those bonds through holy matrimony.


Redditor SuddenlyZoonoses is one of those lucky people. However, she has a problem. According to a recent post on the TIFU subreddit, she took her husband’s last name — and now shares a name with a famous porn star.


“Once we were married, and the name change became official, I began to modify my CV and my more general use resume. I was newly married, finishing my dissertation and getting ready for my career,” she recalled happily, before growing less and less thrilled. “Fast forward to a perfectly innocent presentation on job hunting. The presenter suggests the old trick of Googling yourself to check your web presence for any old, embarrassing relics from social media. I realized I had never Googled my new name, and smiled as I popped open a new search tab on my phone. Imagine my horror as I sat in a crowd of my peers, and the first thing to pop up was a thumbnail of a woman with two dicks in her mouth.”


Admittedly, that’s not an easy one to recover from. Maybe it’s a minor-tier porn star with little web presence?


Alas: “To my growing dismay, I found page after page of porn websites, cam sites, an OF and forums, all tied back to my brilliant new name.”


There goes that option. And that wasn’t the end of it either: “I had to find a way to convey to potential employers that I was an entirely separate person from this taller, admittedly far more attractive woman,” she continued. “In addition to employment, though, I had a more immediate familial issue. [My husband’s family] are kind, pious and a little sheltered. They are also very proud in-laws who have Googled me every time I appeared in the completely boring campus newspaper.


“I knew they would understand, but I had to either allow them to stumble blindly into a literal hurricane of dicks and pregnancy fetish material, or warn them as kindly as I could,” she explained. “Needless to say, our next visit was profoundly awkward.”


Word of advice: This shouldn’t decide the relationship, but maybe Google your potential new name before you marry someone. You don’t want to find out too late in the game that you’ll share a name with a serial killer or that your new name translates to “kill the homeless with tractors” in another language.


Actually, I guess there are worse things than sharing a name with a famous porn star.